Tales Of The Porta Potty

Who likes 'em? But when you have to go, and there is one in all it's blue glory, you thank the good Lord it's there.

Seeing a line of porta potties at a crowded event does make you feel better. You'll still have to wait, but at least it's not going to be so long you seriously consider walking into the bushes and using nature's facilities.

At my daughters last cross country meet, at one of our local country parks where a little bathroom services the whole area, I was glad to see the porta potties. And after drinking my water bottle while I sat around waiting for her race to start, I knew I needed to make use of one of those blue havens.

I did a scouting walk around, checking out which line had shorter wait time, which porta potty had a sign that actually clicked over to the red "occupied" sign, and I finally make a well informed choice.

It was a porta potty. I held my breath and did what I needed to do. But as I was standing up, pulling up my pants, a little girl started yanking on the door. Um, I'm in here. I reach out to make sure the door doesn't pop open, even with the lock on, but I'm too late.

All of her yanking made the whole door jam and door lock wiggle enough to pop open. There I am, standing with my underwear up, thank God, but my pants not. I pull the door closed but it's too late. I've flashed everyone.

Okay. Well. Things happen. Who cares, right? Well, it turns out I do.

I will employ my huge family gathering bathroom rules from now on when dealing with porta potties.

1. Go to the Bathroom in Pairs.

2. Have your Partner Guard the Door while You are in the Bathroom.

3. Return the Favor and Guard the Door for your Partner.

Following these rules will prevent little children yanking your door open. If your partner does her job right!