Thursday, September 6, 2012

When I Was Younger

When I was younger, the last "first day" of school was so exciting.  It was another step towards freedom and leaving childhood behind.  It was a leap towards adulthood, it was the start of making my own decisions.

When I was younger, I never thought if my Mom was sad or watched me leave and thought of me at age 5, on my first "first day" or if she wondered where time had gone to suddenly have a 17 year old in place of her baby.

When I was younger, I didn't know what being a Mom was like or that the last "first day" is kind of hard, and watching my son leave on his last "first day", for a brief moment, I felt his warm little five year old hand in mine, felt the nerves of the first day of Kindergarten, felt perplexed that 12 years had gone by so fast.

I sure hope my smile and kiss goodbye was calm and confident as my Mom's had been all those years ago.  I hope my son left having no idea that I was reaching for the box of tissue as soon as he was gone.  I hope he hit the halls of school, feeling the same joy as I did, when I was younger!

This post inspired by prompt #2 at Mama's Losin' It!


  1. Being a parent is funny. You never know when the emotion is going to hit you. It is true that a child never knows what a parent goes through till they become a parent.

  2. Oh, I am crying all the tears for your son that I bravely held back this week as I released my own little warm 5-year-old's hand into the world.

    This is so sweet. I love the last paragraph the best.

  3. Oh great, so it doesn't get any better! I was kind of hoping that by the time my two are at high school I will be able to care about as much as they do as they skip off into the world. Time to buy some shares in Kleenex ;-)

    Beautifully put!